Almost three quarters of a century ago, George Orwell’s legendary novel “1984” was published, from which we, in particular, learned about Big Brother, who, as we all perhaps know, “is always watching you.” Since then, this phrase has become a kind of symbol of a totalitarian state – but for the hero of today’s tale, it has a completely different meaning.
Yes, the story we’re going to tell you today, from the user u/BigBroSituation, is exactly about how our hero, actually being a big brother to his 9 siblings, had to watch them all – thereby falling into a kind of totalitarian regime of his own parents’. However, let’s not be so critical, but instead tell everything in order.
More info: Reddit
RELATED:The author of the post is 22 years old and he is the big brother in a family with 10 siblings
The thing is that the author’s parents are quite religious, so they consider every baby to be part of God’s plan
The parents, alas, had always been putting the burden of babysitting onto the shoulders of their eldest kid
So, as soon as the author came of age, he moved out and rented a place quite far away from his parents’ home
The author also let his younger siblings move in with him, thus being accused of “turning his back on the family” by his parents
So, the Original Poster (OP) tells us that he is 22 years old now, and he’s the eldest of his parents’ ten children. Our hero would’ve had even more siblings, but his mother had several miscarriages. It’s all about his parents’ specific attitude to protection – they never care about this, considering each baby a true gift from above.
The couple earns well, but due to the number of kids, it has always been quite difficult for them to provide for such a large family, and the children had to share rooms, never had enough private space and whatnot. In addition, the entire burden of babysitting has always been placed on our hero. Yes, he’s two years older than the second oldest child in the family, and his parents always expected him to take care of the siblings.
No, our hero understood perfectly well that it wasn’t easy for his mom and dad, and he tried in every way to help them. But he also understood that the constant influx of new kids in the family actually deprived him of a full-fledged childhood, and as soon as he came of age, he moved out, renting a place further away – about an hour’s drive from his parents’ house. Just so he wouldn’t be pestered with requests to babysit…
Interestingly, almost immediately after the author left, his parents switched their demands to babysit to his sister, then to the third eldest child – and after some time, both turned to their big brother with a literal plea to let them live with him. Our hero understood perfectly well what they were going through, so he let them in.
Moreover, he clearly hinted to the other teen siblings about this “loophole” – as a result, he received accusations from his parents of “turning his back on the family.” So, the guy decided to take it online in order to get some moral support.
Well, in fact, many parents are often happy to shift part of the burden of looking after younger kids onto the shoulders of older ones, without realizing how selfish such an approach can be. For example, the Super Nanny website notes that many parents don’t understand (or don’t want to understand) that requiring teens to babysit younger siblings actually brings them a lot of stress.
In addition, experts are quite sure that relationships between brothers and sisters should be, first and foremost, sibling relationships, not “nanny – kid” ones. “Older siblings should be older siblings who may occasionally provide temporary oversight. Older siblings should not be virtual stand-ins or replacements for mom and dad,” this dedicated article on Siblings Relationship Lab says.
“If your younger children are receiving more direct care and provision from older siblings than from parents, there is a problem.” Well, in that case, I have some bad news for the original poster’s parents – their family really does have serious problems. By the way, many readers have noted this in the comments under the original post as well.
Thus, the responders claimed that the decision to have so many kids doesn’t belong to the author, but to his parents, and it’s they who should actually bear the full responsibility for this. The commenters are also sure that the OP didn’t actually turn his back on his family, but simply chose to live his own life, and gave the same, quite reasonable, advice to his siblings. So do you, our dear readers, also agree with this point of view?
People in the comments, meanwhile, unanimously sided with the author and blamed his parents for being selfish and unreasonable
